Verbage
Anyone who has known me from birth can tell you that I haven't always been the best at thinking about what I say before I say it when expressing my emotions. Often, I start talking and find myself in the middle of a sentence wondering how I got there or if that is what I really meant. Stopping in the middle of a sentence shows my complete lack of resonance of what I'm feeling with the words I'm speaking. The paralyzing part is that we don't have a delete button once words are out in the open. So do words enable or disable? I've had experience with both.
Luckily, over the years I have progressed from being stuck in the middle of a sentence and throwing a punch to at least backtracking and trying again... but oh how I wish that I could resemble a poet and concoct within a few cleverly placed words, a perfectly harmonic union between emotion and expression. What an absolute completeness these aesthetic entomologists have the ability to create. I wonder though how often they are able to assemble these masterpieces on the spot in the midst of their daily interactions? Can they pulsate the same harmony or do their words often lead them to a verbal dead end similar to mine?
The best lab test for meaningless words is observing or participating in a conversation that defines a relationship of any kind. As outsiders, we look pitifully at the poor saps that have to go through such a dance, but we ironically can't turn away from watching it. Like a moth to a flame. It's interesting to see how another audaciously attempts to make the awkward connection between words and emotion, while trying to keep in tact any sort of sensor for the other person's feelings. Most people are not satisfied with trite, pithy, and vague answers, thus, we treacherously begin to talk ourselves in circles. Eventually both parties walk away somewhat resolved with the answers they got, but somewhat pinged by guilt in thinking... "did I really mean that?"
My favorite new affront to this tangled game is the "damned if you do, damned if you don't" mentality. This notion is based upon the idea that anything you say can and will be used against you. And instead of possibly saying what you "don't mean," especially when you don't know how you really feel, you opt for silence. This is my first encounter with this position. Normally, people feel a need to assuage concerns immediately, if not haphazardly. Interesting, what generates this type of reaction? A lifetime of jostled comprehension? Regret? Confusion?
Whatever it is, it causes me to stop and think... hopefully before I speak.
Luckily, over the years I have progressed from being stuck in the middle of a sentence and throwing a punch to at least backtracking and trying again... but oh how I wish that I could resemble a poet and concoct within a few cleverly placed words, a perfectly harmonic union between emotion and expression. What an absolute completeness these aesthetic entomologists have the ability to create. I wonder though how often they are able to assemble these masterpieces on the spot in the midst of their daily interactions? Can they pulsate the same harmony or do their words often lead them to a verbal dead end similar to mine?
The best lab test for meaningless words is observing or participating in a conversation that defines a relationship of any kind. As outsiders, we look pitifully at the poor saps that have to go through such a dance, but we ironically can't turn away from watching it. Like a moth to a flame. It's interesting to see how another audaciously attempts to make the awkward connection between words and emotion, while trying to keep in tact any sort of sensor for the other person's feelings. Most people are not satisfied with trite, pithy, and vague answers, thus, we treacherously begin to talk ourselves in circles. Eventually both parties walk away somewhat resolved with the answers they got, but somewhat pinged by guilt in thinking... "did I really mean that?"
My favorite new affront to this tangled game is the "damned if you do, damned if you don't" mentality. This notion is based upon the idea that anything you say can and will be used against you. And instead of possibly saying what you "don't mean," especially when you don't know how you really feel, you opt for silence. This is my first encounter with this position. Normally, people feel a need to assuage concerns immediately, if not haphazardly. Interesting, what generates this type of reaction? A lifetime of jostled comprehension? Regret? Confusion?
Whatever it is, it causes me to stop and think... hopefully before I speak.
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